Bye Bye Monday Blues

Just The Tip

How I get Over that inevitable Monday Hurdle.

 

Over the years I’ve had a small selection of jobs. Some I’ve liked more than others. Some have been downright painful, not just on a Monday either.

 

I used to have this conversation with my old boss and friend every single week. I said I struggled with Mondays, because it felt like a chore, and that time went so much slower than any other day of the week, but Tuesdays were wonderful because I’d conquered Monday so that was proof I could conquer anything. Her views were slightly different, she tackled Monday with energy and enthusiasm, which was drained from her during the course of the day, so by Tuesday she felt deflated, thus declaring Tuesday as the worst day of the week.

 

We will never agree on that, but hey ho. If you’re like me and want to banish those Monday Blues then read on my friends!

 

I’ve perfected a few techniques to ease the pain slightly and help me power through that Monday feeling.

 

 

  1. Prep a delicious lunch Sunday evening for Monday. Treat yourself to your favourite things.
  2. Plan something exciting for that evening, perhaps coffee with a friend? Or an hour to sit and watch that new TV programme you’re into? Maybe even a trip to the cinema? the world is your oyster.
  3. Wear something that makes you feel good. Nothing puts a smile on my face like wearing a pretty dress.
  4. Schedule something fun for the weekend, and focus on that. Get through today then I’m a day closer to …
  5. Go to bed at a reasonable time Sunday night. Being tired only exasperates those Monday Blues.

 

 

I sincerely hope my 5 little tricks help you in at least a little way!

 

Love

 

Nicole x

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Redirecting Anger

Just The Tip

I wish so very much that I had the knowledge that I have now, a few years ago. I used to be a very angry person, filled with hate. Now I’m still angry and hateful sometimes (I wouldn’t be human if I didn’t get angry every now and again!) but I can channel that energy into something more productive and healthy.

 

  1. Exercise. Every time I have beaten a personal best on the cross trainer, or exercise bike or even a walk, has been when I’ve felt particularly angry. I shove my headphones in, turn up the music and just go. I’m a huge fan of throwing some mad shapes to try and shake that anger out. I start off bitter and hateful, but pretty soon I’m hitting it so hard that my brain can’t concentrate on pushing my body and being angry at the same time. What can I say, I’m a simpleton!
  2. Write it down. Put pen to paper, or fingers to keyboard and let those hate fuelled words fill your page. Write a letter to the person you’re angry at (just don’t send it!), write a diary entry, write a blog. I normally direct my anger into a blog, save it in drafts and revisit when I’ve cooled down. If it’s any good, I tweak it with a fresh mind and post it. If it’s literally line after line of swearing, I’ll probably hit that delete button.
  3. Do something creative. I used to love drawing, I’m not any good at it, but I enjoyed it. I’d have a little sketch up and it’d calm me right down. Those drawings were culled in the great bedroom clear out of 2014, never to be seen again. But at the time, they helped.
  4. Seek company from an animal. Horses were a huge part of my life when I was younger so if I was feeling angry I’d just pop to the stables, pick up a dandy brush and groom my horse whilst ranting about all those things that horrible boy did. Dogs work just as well, in fact anything that can’t talk back is perfect.
  5. Watch a funny film. Laughter is contagious, it releases endorphins. 30 minutes into a decent comedy and my anger has dispersed. Just make sure you pick a film that’s guaranteed to make you laugh. This is definitely not a time to experiment with comedies!
  6. A nice hot shower. For some people its baths, for me it’s a shower. I spent many an evening standing under the hot water in my shower waiting for all the anger to metaphorically wash away down the drain. Sometimes it’d only take the time it took me to wash and condition my hair to start feeling happier, other times I’d still be standing there, red raw from the extremely hot water a good 20 -30 minutes waiting for the anger to go.

 

I find these the best ways in which to utilise that negative energy. Don’t get me wrong, sometimes the best medicine is shoving your face into a pillow and screaming to your hearts content, and I have definitely done this a good few times, but if I can I try to avoid it. Screaming only gives me a sore throat 😉

 

Love

 

Nicole

 

xoxo

The Power of Can’t

Just The Tip

The Power of Can’t

 

How many times a day do you say the word can’t? Go on, have a little tally up, I’ll wait here.

 

I probably say the word can’t at least 5 times a day.

“I can’t do that.”

“I can’t afford that.”

“I can’t get there.”

 

In reality, I can.

 

Can’t is a word to denote a physical incapability.

 

“I can’t physically fly.” (Unaided of course, I completely understand the purpose and premise of airplanes!)

“I can’t fit into a size 6.” Much to my disappointment, I physically cannot force my size 12 backside into a pair of size 6 jeans, with all the will in the world, it’s just not going to happen – even if I dieted extremely, my body is just not destined to be a size 6 (trust me, I’ve tried!)

 

Can’t is often confused with won’t.

 

“I can’t afford to go out for dinner tonight” well I can, but I’d rather not spend that money on food, when I’ve got to save for new windows. So in reality what I am saying is “I won’t go out for dinner tonight because I have that money earmarked for something else.”

 

“I can’t run a marathon.” Ok, I might not be physically fit enough to run one right this second, but if I start training, of course I can run a marathon, what I’m really saying is “I won’t run a marathon because I don’t want to try – also, I’m very lazy” (that last bit is very specific to me!)

 

People often use the word can’t as an excuse, rather than admitting to themselves that they can, but just do not want to.

 

I’ve done it numerous times, “I can’t leave the office on time to get to that event.” I could leave the office on time, I just chose not to. I wouldn’t tell my boss I had to leave on time, I wouldn’t pack my things away at half 5, but I had said “I can’t come” to my friends.

 

“I can’t do anymore burpees.” Of course I can, I just don’t want to! Can’t only comes into play here, when I’m lying in a heap on the floor, dry heaving because I’ve already vomited from exhaustion and there is literally nothing left.

 

Henry Ford said, ‘Whether you think you can, or you think you can’t, you’re right.’ It’s all about mind-set, mind over matter. Tell yourself that you can and propel yourself into success, or tell yourself that you can’t and stay exactly where you are.

 

Can and can’t are very powerful words. Saying out loud I can’t … confirms subconsciously that you aren’t even going to try. Saying I can’t is admitting defeat before you’ve even left the starting line. It’s the only real way to fail.

 

You might not be successful first time, second time, or even third time, but eventually, if you keep trying, you will be able to say, ‘I can’ just like that little train in Dumbo, “I think I can, I think I can…” if he’d have said “I can’t” and stopped chugging up that hill, that would have been a pretty poor Disney film, don’t you agree?

 

Love

 

Nic

 

xoxo

 

Online Dating Disorder

Just The Tip

ODD

Online Dating Disorder.

Symptoms include:

Unhealthy increase in confidence

Inability to filter own thoughts to form appropriate sentences

Distorted opinion of own aesthetics

Increased irritability when messages are seen and not replied to

Slight paranoia

In extreme cases – stalker like tendencies.

If you start to experience any of these symptoms it is very important that you take the following steps:

TURN OFF THE APP

Put your phone/computer down

Pour a large glass of wine (Wine can be substituted for alternative alcoholic beverage)

LIVE YOUR LIFE

ODD is becoming more and more common in todays world. With dating apps available at every turn the ability to meet people organically has been compromised.

I was talking to a guy I met on Tinder, when he said he recognised me from somewhere. Turns out he thinks he has seen me in a bar that we both frequent, he seemed shocked when I said I obviously hadn’t made much of an impression as he hadn’t come over to say hello. Apparently he’d look like a ‘mug’ if he approached me without knowing who I was.

I said that its normal to get chatting to people at a bar, he said not to him.

Prime example right there of Keyboard Confidence, a disability heavily associated with ODD. Despite his apparent inability to approach people in person, the conversation flowed remarkably well. Eventually we changed numbers and continued the chat via Text.

He seemed very confident and teetered on the edge of unattractively self-assured, but managed to keep me laughing, which put him back in the potentials column.

ODD manifests itself in a multitude of ways, but it is a disease that multiplies quicker than you can type a sordid message to a match on PoF. It is curable, but only after months of therapy and a fair few bottles of wine.

Unfortunately the cure isn’t as simple as meeting a partner and forming a fully functioning relationship. ODD is something that can lay dormant for a considerable time, only triggered again by a disagreement with your partner, which sends you straight back online.

OOD has a variety of severities, it starts with a little white lie, using an image that you know hides your flaws, it then grows with the compliments, the profile likes and messages to inflate your ego to an unhealthy size where if it almost impossible to contain the arrogance, then it happens, without being able to filter your words, arrogance streams out like a waterfall of bullshit.

 

Love

 

xoxo

5 Simple Steps to Finding and Keeping a Partner

Just The Tip

There are 5 easy to follow steps to securing yourself a man/woman, follow them and you’ll be spoilt for choice.

 

Step One: Lower those standards

 

There is always one person in the relationship that ‘settles’. The other person will naturally feel the need to work harder to maintain the relationship. You always want to be the ‘settler’ that way you’ll be treated like the prince/princess that you are.

Princess Emoji.png

 

Step Two: Follow them around

 

People love puppies, so following your love interest around like a little lost one is sure to melt his/her heart. Flutter those eyelids and whimper occasionally, just to let them know you’re still there, and need attention.

Heart Eyes.png

 

Step Three: Learn to cook

 

Everyone wants to be taken care of, so whipping up a glorious spread of chicken dippers and chips with a side of beans is definitely showing your love interest that you are partner material. Just don’t burn those chips!

Chip Emoji.png

 

Step Four: Keep those options open

 

Don’t limit yourself to just one, find a couple of men/women who take your fancy and pursue them simultaneously, this gives you a far better success rate. If one doesn’t reciprocate your interest, then move on to the next one. Much like a conveyer belt of potential partners.

 people emoji.GIF

 

Step Five: Relax

 

Disregard everything you have read in the above and focus on your own happiness. If you aren’t happy in yourself, how can you expect someone else to be happy with you?

 

Smile emoji

 

There are some things in life you just cannot rush, and finding ‘the one’ is definitely one of those. Stop looking and I guarantee you’ll be happier and more likely to find your special one.

 

Good Luck

 

Love 
 

xoxo