Go Ape

Fun and Games, Personal

My Go Ape Tree Top Adventure.


My Lovely little sister turned 21 earlier this summer, and I had no damn clue what to get her. What do you get the girl who doesn’t want anything? Nothing, and as much as I wanted to do that, I couldn’t. So I asked her, do you want a thing or a day out. She opted for day out and decided on Go Ape.


We’ve been a couple of times before, so knew it was definitely a worthwhile trip for us. So this Sunday, we packed up our trainers and packed lunches and hit the road.


Leeds Castle is only an hour away from us, so by leaving at 1.30, we were sure to get there well before our allocated time slot of 3.30… that is of course, if I knew how to follow simple driving instructions, like what turn off to take on the M25. In my defence, we all know about my failings on the M25, it should have been expected.


So after a 35 minute detour, we arrived with 30 minutes to spare, which was enough time to find the loo, get harnessed up, crack a few terrible jokes and read through the safety manual.


When I booked the tickets, there was no one else booked on at that time, when we got there however it was a full damn class. Fortunately, the instructor starting us all off on our adventure, noticed me and my sister as the smallest group and set us off first, which was fabulous until we caught up with the group of 9 from the time slot before ours. They literally took sooooo long to get through any obstacle. But we didn’t let that spoil our fun.


For those of you who haven’t been to Go Ape, there are 5 zones, all increasing in difficulty. Zone 1 is the baby, training, dipping your toe in Zone. Easy peasy. There’s a rope ladder, a few various crossings, a Tarzan swing and a zip wire, all fairly low to the ground.


As you progress through the zones, they get higher into the trees and more and more difficult.


I gave my sister the choice, would you rather go first or second. She chose first, so she could ’Show me how it’s done.’ And show me she did, except on the ring crossing, that’s my jam and I freaking nailed it. No one is taking that away from me!


When it came to the zip wires though, that girl knows how to zip! Her undefeated reign of landing every single zip wire was still intact at the end of the day, while I had taken home half of their woodchip in my knickers/socks and hair. I’m not the most graceful, let’s put it that way, especially when I’m being dragged along the end of the zip wire landing because my legs just down right gave up on impact.


I’ll admit that while completing Go Ape, I didn’t look my best, in black gym leggings that show off every lump and bump, my grey ‘Introvert’ tee and grey trainers, all the while modelling what I am sure is to be a beautiful camel toe after chucking myself off the Tarzan Swing and inadvertently being wedgied to high hell by the harness, sexy AF, amiright?


At the end of the day, we were awarded certificates, proving our completion of the Tree Top Adventure – definitely my most valued certificate, forget those AAT ones that cost me near enough £2000, I’m a god damn warrior when it comes to Go Ape!


I did manage to borrow my friends GoPro and chest harness (adding to my overall stunning look) to try to capture the day. I haven’t looked at the footage, but if it’s any good, and you’d like to see, leave a comment on this post telling me! 🙂  Be warned, I think there are a lot of unflattering angles and funny faces, and if it picked up sound, quite possibly me talking about how unfit I am, how unhappy my armpits are and how much I need a wee. Totes ladylike!

Whole heartedly recommend you book your adventure now, if you haven’t been before… or even if you have!


Nicole x


4 thoughts on “Go Ape

    1. We are watching the GoPro footage right now, and let me tell you it is no longer a mystery why I’m single with comments like ‘Oh my god, I am sweating.’ and ‘Jesus Christ, who wants to exercise!’

      Liked by 1 person

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